


Ghosts

by DizzyDelyrium



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hopeful Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-10
Updated: 2017-11-10
Packaged: 2019-01-31 14:08:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12683469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DizzyDelyrium/pseuds/DizzyDelyrium
Summary: Jesse wakes up from another nightmare, haunted by things he's done.  Hanzo is there to chase the demons away and keep Jesse safe in the dark.





	Ghosts

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Xweetalk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xweetalk/gifts).



> This is for [Xweetalk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xweetalk/pseuds/Xweetalk) and I think...maybe...this should have been a bit more fluffy. But angst happened. It ends on a hopeful note! I hope you like it. Thank you for reading!

Cigarette smoke and gun powder. Something burning. Something crackling and voices raising in alarm nearby. It feels so _real_. It's right there in front of him, wrapping around his senses and choking him. His throat feels scratchy from the smoke...his heart is pounding like an erratic drumbeat against his ribs. He's running as fast as he can, his feet slamming into the earth so hard it's jarring. Gun shots behind him, and bullets whizzing passed his ears. His ears ringing relentlessly, as they would for years to come.

Jesse rounds a corner of a canyon, his feet skidding in the loose rock, and he ducks behind a sand colored boulder. The sun is impossibly hot overhead and sweat is rolling down the back of his neck into his shirt. He cannot cry, if they catch him crying they'll shoot him too for being too _weak_. He covers his face with his hands, swallowing down guilt and burying his panic. He needs water...or something stronger.

He hears a click next to his head. The familiar click of a gun cocking. His eyes turn upward and there's a man there with a hard expression kneeling next to him. Behind him, tucked into a cave in the canyon are a woman with two small boys, their eyes wide with fear. Jesse hadn't noticed them when he'd come around the corner. Too lost in his own panicked escape.

He licks his lips, never taking his eyes off of the man in front of him. If the man alerted the cops, he was done for. So there's one option...one thing to do. He can't go to prison out here. He knew what happened in prisons out here from the stories the others told at night, huddled around the fire. His fingers twitch at his side and he forces his mind to go blank. 

His gun is in his hand before the man can react. Jesse never misses. He wishes desperately he missed sometimes...now. Then. God he wishes he had missed then.

It smell like...blood and dirt.

Jesse screams and sits up, grabbing his chest. His eyes are wide and wild, searching the black room quickly. His brain is reeling, struggling to grasp at reality after the vivid dream. More than a dream...his ghosts coming back to haunt him. Their faces are still lingering in his mind, as if they ever really left. 

Strong arms around his waist pull him closer and Jesse almost fights them. His mind is still screaming at him to fight, run, _escape_. They'll catch him...they'll drag him down with him. Take him somewhere worse than here.

“Jesse.” The tired voice snaps him back to reality almost immediately. That voice wraps around him like a protective shield, chasing the ghosts away. 

Jesse lets his hands fall, tension easing out of him finally as he lets himself collapse back against the headboard. His back sticks to the wood uncomfortably, sticky from sweat after his nightmare. He curls his hand around Hanzo's arm, squeezing him to make sure he's real, “Sorry, Sweetheart...go back t' sleep.”

Hanzo presses against his side, wrapping his arms around him more securely like he always did, “Who was it?”

“Don't matter who it was, they're dead.” Jesse replies more harshly than he means. If anyone understood the ghosts, it was Hanzo. He had demons on his back just like Jesse...maybe even more. He had no right being so harsh with him.

He feels Hanzo's fingers gently stroking his bare hip in a soothing manner, unperturbed by Jesse's curt tone, “It matters. Come here.”

“I am here.” Jesse tells him stubbornly, refusing to move from his spot. He can see more clearly in the dark now. He's not in New Mexico. He's not a teenager running from the law. He's a full grown man, laying safely in his bed like he has no right to do. He's surrounded by his personal things and he has the most intoxicating man alive laying at his side. A man who held him every night no matter what came for Jesse in the darkness.

“No. You're up there and far away.” Hanzo tells him and drags Jesse down into his arms. Jesse doesn't fight him, he never does anymore. He had at first...too embarrassed and ashamed by what was happening. Sometimes he'd get violent, lashing out at faces long gone before he realized he wasn't there anymore. Hanzo took it all in stride, held him until he calmed down. 

Jesse slips further down into the comfortable warmth of their bed, guilt constricting his throat. He buries himself against Hanzo's chest, letting the other man bring his arms around him protectively. Hanzo smells like his own musky sweat, sleep, and linens. It's comforting and familiar in a way Jesse clings to on nights like this.

Hanzo presses his nose into Jesse's hair and breathes him in. He's humming gently, and it reverberates against Jesse's body where he's pressed firmly against him, “We should go to the ocean. It will not be busy this time of year.” His voice is rough with sleep but it's Jesse's favorite sound in the world. He can get lost in Hanzo's voice. The soft accent and the hushed tones soothing him until he can drift to sleep. Hanzo had a power no one before him had...he could chase away the ghosts. The dreams happened less and less often now. Part of Jesse hated that. He felt like they were his penance, but Hanzo...sometimes he made him feel like he deserved peace.

“I like the ocean.” Jesse mutters against him and lets his own arms curl around his lover tightly. His fingers press into the solid muscle of Hanzo's back, sliding against the familiar curves and deep scars to map them out. He loves every piece of him desperately. It felt like he was drowning in it sometimes for how much he loves him. 

“Jesse.” Hanzo's lips press against his and Jesse feels the last remnants of tension and the nightmare ebb out of him. He reaches to slide his thumb across the rough planes of Hanzo's cheek, feeling the stubble against the usually smooth skin. Both of them were struggling to atone for pasts they had no right to be forgiven for. Every life saved was another offering to the dead, asking for forgiveness.

Jesse eases into Hanzo's embrace and allows himself to just be held. He can hear Hanzo's heart beating rhythmically against his chest and feel the steady rise and fall of his breathing. They hadn't said the words, but they each felt their love growing every day and night. Every mission they completed together was another step toward their atonement, and they were taking those steps side by side. 

He lets his eyes fall shut and his mind feels blissfully silent. He'd never be fully redeemed for the things he'd done, he knows that. Maybe Hanzo wouldn't be either. Together though...at least they could fight their demons together. 

"Ya know...I think maybe it's your turn to make me breakfast in the morning." Jesse says softly against Hanzo's chest, trying to lighten the mood to ease their thoughts before they both drift back to sleep.

Hanzo scoffs under him and it makes Jesse smile, "The last time I cooked for you you did nothing but complain."

"Ya hardly made enough to get a man through to lunch." Jesse points out, remembering the rice and spiced vegetables. It had been delicious to be sure, but Hanzo didn't exactly put together hearty meals.

"Hm.." Hanzo taps his fingers against Jesse's back gently, and Jesse can almost feel the rough callouses of his fingertips on his skin. 

Jesse smiles and kisses Hanzo once more, not minding the taste of sleep on his breath in the slightest. He moves and cradles his face in his hands, "I love you...you know that? Don't you?"

Hanzo's expression is almost unreadable in the darkness, and for one painful moment Jesse is sure he's made a mistake. The expression softens though and he feels arms close tightly around him in an embrace. Hanzo presses close, resting against him, "I love you too."

**Author's Note:**

> I know Hanzo and Jesse have both done bad things, and I don't like to ignore that stuff. I personally really love redemption arcs, and they both have such great potential for really great character progression in that way. So I like this, where they're working together to try and overcome their past. They can't forget it or ignore it, but they can be better now to atone for it.
> 
> Anyway, again this was for [Xweetalk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xweetalk/pseuds/Xweetalk). And I so hope you liked it! 
> 
> Thanks all for reading. If you liked it, please leave me some feedback below. Thanks guys!


End file.
